Beyond looking for clues in a book, workshop or blog, many successful people find the clues they need for success by reaching out to people who have accomplished what they are trying to achieve. Who can you reach out to as a mentor, coach, consultant or advisor to assist you with achieving your dreams? Don’t assume that successful people wouldn’t want to help you, rather assume the opposite and begin asking. You’ll find that most successful people are very open and willing to share how they have achieved their success with others. Okay, so if you’re now thinking, Why would someone spend the time sharing how they achieved their success with me? Why would they care about helping me? Stop thinking that way right now. Instead, write down the names of two or three people, who you don’t have to personally know, that have achieved the success you’re looking for and reach out to them to buy them lunch or a cup of coffee to talk about how they achieved their success. You’ll be pleasantly surprised how willing most successful people will be to sharing their success with others.

There is a quote from Anthony Robbins that sums up the theme of this blog very well.

“Long ago, I realized that success leaves clues, and that people who produce outstanding results do specific things to create those results. I believed that if I precisely duplicated the actions of others, I could reproduce the same quality of results that they had.” 

Anthony Robbins

Robbins point is that regardless of what it is that you want to accomplish in life, someone has probably already been successful at achieving that and all you need to do is look for the clues as to how to do it. Those clues exist in books, blogs, seminars or workshops or countless other formats. It doesn’t matter if what you want to achieve is better relationships, financial independence, completing a triathlon or beating a deadly disease – someone has done it and left clues for you to do the same. Start with being clear about what you want to achieve and actively look for clues and take action! 

The key tenet behind Simon Sinek’s leadership approach of ‘Leaders Eat Last’ is the concept that leaders need to create an environment where it is safe for their employees to be their best selves and thrive. Leaders do this by making sure the environment doesn’t punish calculated risk taking, allows for creativity and innovation to thrive without an unhealthy level of fear of failure. Creating a safe environment for the people you lead doesn’t mean there aren’t any risks for employees and that they are ‘safe’ from high standards and performance expectations. Productivity, creativity and innovation thrive when employees know that their leaders support their efforts and make it safe for experimenting and pushing the envelope in pursuit of better performance. A leader who takes care of his/her people and creates a safe environment for them to thrive will in the end realize great benefits not only for his/her people but also for the organization and ultimately themselves as well.  That is why truly great leaders know why it’s important that ‘Leaders Eat Last’.

We are often our own worst enemies when it comes to realizing the success we desire in life. We sabotage our own success by being too willing to accept the limitations that others attempt to place on us. This happens when we accept even well-meaning comments from people we like and trust such as “that’ll never work”, “you can’t do that” or “why don’t you just stick to what you know will work”. Those comments when accepted and acted upon, act as a wet blanket being thrown over or ambitions for building a better life for ourselves. In addition, we often get turned down for promotions or have our ideas rejected for a variety of reasons, some legitimate and some not. Look to the ‘Big Why’ you have for pursuing your better life and ‘Reject Rejection’ by continuing to move towards your goal. There are plenty of famous examples to draw on such as Thomas Edison continuing to pursue the electric lightbulb after dozens of failed attempts or Michael Jordan not making the varsity basketball team as sophomore and using that as motivation to work harder and get better. You don’t need those examples for you to realize the success you desire. You only need to connect with your inner motivations for realizing the success you want to provide the courage and energy to ‘Reject Rejection’ and keep pursuing your goals. 

One of the biggest failures of most business-related college programs, bachelors or masters level, is they don’t include any elements of developing the ability to engage others as a part of the curriculum. Most business degrees focus on the intellectual aspects of business and not the human aspects of business. In my 30+years of experience working with dozens of different senior leaders, almost all of them were very smart individuals, but not all of them were highly effective leaders. The best leaders I worked with were not only very smart individuals they were also very good at building a culture of engagement. Building a culture of engagement is not something you can buy; it must be built by the leader through consistently connecting with the people he or she leads on a daily basis. It is built by connecting with all stakeholders on an emotional level and can’t be accomplished simply by demanding it. The person at the top needs to set the example through his or her words and deeds and also hold others accountable to a high standard of treating all others with respect, connecting with others on a human level and valuing everyone else as a person and not just a worker. That approach over time will create a culture of engagement that is far more productive and profitable than a workplace built on lots of rules and a command-and-control approach.

Few of the most important and meaningful elements in our lives are easily obtained. Doesn’t matter if those elements are healthy relationships with family members, a financially secure retirement, or a nice house to all home, few of the best things in life are easily obtained. They all take persistent effort over time to obtain, acquire or achieve. Whatever your hopes and dreams are for the remainder of your life, the extent to which you realize your dreams will depend to a great extent to how persistent you are in achieving them. I had a friend in high school who wanted a job at the local K-Mart. Several of his closest friends, including me, were already working there. It was a good job for a high school student as it paid a little better than minimum wage, had flexible hours, and you were able to work with many of your friends. He decided he wanted to get a job there so he came to the store, asked for an application and turned it back in. He was rejected because there weren’t any openings. What did he do? He did the same every week for over twelve weeks until he got hired! He didn’t give up because it was that important to him. That job helped pay for his technical school degree and he eventually became a highly skilled Tool and Die Maker. That one continuous effort to secure that job had a lasting impact on his life. Next time you feel frustrated with coming up short for accomplishing one of your dreams, remember, you will only fail if you fail to keep trying.