Introduction

The purpose of this exercise is to have the participant reflect on their beliefs regarding the causes for when they don’t have the success they desire in their lives and making the changes needed to get there. This is intended to be completed on an individual basis but could be shared with a trusted individual to validate the participants perspective or provide suggested changes.

Process

Instruct the participants with the following steps without providing much guidance beyond what is provided.  You don’t want to influence their responses such that they alter how they write them down initially with regards to taking 100% responsibility.

1. Reflect on a current project, goal or relationship in your life that is realizing less than the success you desire.
2. Write the top three to five reasons you believe why this situation is less than successful.
3. Review the reasons you’ve written down and look for wording that indicates or demonstrates not taking 100% responsibility for the results – look for wording that is blaming others or making excuses
4. Rewrite the reasons stated in a manner as actions where you “take 100% responsibility for the results” and not blaming others or making excuses – write these actions in a way that states the positive condition you want to exist and not the absence of a negative condition
5. Begin incorporating the actions into your daily meditation, goal affirmation and action items

Examples

Reason: My marriage is strained because my wife doesn’t listen to me and understand my needs

Action (Positive Condition): I need to communicate more effectively with my wife, so we better understand each other’s needs

Action (Absence of Negative Condition): I need to communicate more effectively with my wife, so we have a harmonious relationship

Introduction

This activity can be completed by as little as two individuals or groups of up to five to six individuals. The purpose of this exercise is to get people to recognize where they are not taking 100% responsibility in key areas in their life and how they can change that. This is a great exercise for introducing the concept of taking 100% responsibility without overwhelming them.

Process:

1. 1. 1. 1. Divide the participants in equal groups in a range from 2 up to 6 participants – have participants sit in a circle or facing each other if in groups of 2.
         2. Have the Responsibility Stems that you want to work on displayed on a flip chart or one per page on a PowerPoint slide.
         3. Have the participants complete the Responsibility Stems one at time by going around the circle in a clockwise manner – Have them state the entire Responsibility Stem and then adding their words to complete the sentence.
         4. Demonstrate the process by completing a sample Responsibility Stem while providing multiple answers.
         5. Continue going around the circle until all participants have had multiple chance to complete the Responsibility Stem – this may require 2-5 minutes per sentence.
         6. You can use multiple sentences depending on the most important topics that need to be covered.
         7. Have the participants reflect on their responses for completing the Responsibility Stems and determine what adjustments they need to make to accomplish their desired results for each of the topics covered.

 

Example Sentence Stems & Responses*

If I were to take 5% more responsibility for my life and well-being….

•I would exercise 30 minutes a day
•I would only eat fast food one time per week
•I would meditate more often

If I were to take 5% more responsibility for the attainment of my goals….

•I would do five things a day to get me closer to my goal
•I would spend an extra hour a day in action rather than watching TV
•I would share my goals with family and friends and ask for accountability

If I were to take 5% more responsibility for success in my relationships….

•I would plan quality time with my kids and put it in my calendar
•I would have a date night every week with my spouse
•I would talk less and listen more

*These sentence completions are based on the work of Nathaniel Branden, Ph.D.

It’s mid-January and most people are off and running into the new year and many are already struggling with keeping their weeks old new year’s resolutions. What’s happening, are they hitting serious roadblocks, are the resolutions too difficult to keep or perhaps is it the person’s approach to achieving the goals they established? Let me share a very simple yet powerful concept that will have a profound impact on the success you realize in life.
The reason most resolutions or goals are not achieved successfully usually has very little to do with how the goal itself is written. It most often has to do with what happens when we run into roadblocks or hurdles along the way. Do you make excuses or blame external circumstances, or do you look in the mirror and except responsibility for your results? The most successful people in life take 100% responsibility for their success. Let me provide a quick example. It’s raining outside and the showroom traffic is very light to non-existent. One salesperson stands and looks out the window wondering how he’s going to reach his goal for how many cars he needs to sell this month. Another salesperson decides to start calling all her customers that she sold cars to the previous year to see if they’re still happy, to see if they’re interested in trading their car in soon and to see if they know someone that is shopping for a car. One salesperson will blame the weather for not reaching his goals and the other salesperson is taking responsibility for reaching her goals. Which person do you want to be?
Start taking 100% responsibility for your success in life and realize a better life!